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Marriages are like pancakes. There’s no shame in throwing out the first one.
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Love is not having to hold in your farts anymore.
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I love being married. It’s great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
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I got my wife a present that will really take her breath away, a treadmill.
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I don’t like that we are fighting, tell me you’re sorry.
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Having me as your daughter, is the only gift you need.
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Insanity Runs in my Family
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#mommyissues
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#daddyissues
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You cannot hurt my feelings, do you know who my mom is?
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All Women are Crazy!
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Save the drama for your mama
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Hot Mess Express
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